NOTICE: Mein Bereich encountered some whacky problem. THat's why it was unavailable for quite some time. Rest assured I'm sill here.
Yesterday’s New paper was on a certain theme.
“Singaporeans bo hua in bed”.
And u noe who take the blame?
SINGAPOREAN MEN.
Like... simi lan jiao understand!
The “queens of singapore” claim that singaporean men dunno how to please them. Dunno anything sweet. Dunno this dunno that. Dunno what is romantic.
Then some will emphasize that the ang moh men better. This onebetter. That onebetter.
So I say..... YOU LIKE ANG MOH PPL GO MIGRATE LA KNN!!!
I bet you ar a lot of this stupid queens so ugly and proud and confirm sure cannot get ang moh....... if they get also is the rejects... like fat ones. No hunks.
Singaporean men are good in bed okay!
Just ask me. I will show u. I wil tell u my fuck-ventures. muahaha.
Otherwise u might wan to ask hasrul. He so good in bed (touching lan lan and changing pampers) that old men like to scold him. He likes it rough, remember?
And he play dress up as nurse.
So anyways the stupid queens of Singapore only wan the 5Cs.
Which is what?
Condo... car.. credit card.... uh.... sth ...... and another sth.
Which is obviously a reflection of their super damn shallow mindset la.
So romantic = money?
NO!
Romantic is about seeing ur loved one happy happy while u over here in the mud, naked and bleeding?
NO!
Romantic is about~~~~>.......................................................
Being able to transport the two of you (three... if you are a two-timer) into a happy/loving separate, private world from eveyone else.
Correct anot?
We all love to escape reality. Away from world, problem.
aa.. this is romantic.
Agreed?
See..... I can see donald nodding his head. Cos he do this a lot with clara.... until it becomes a fairytale. LOL.
So anyways I damn doo lan with this stupid 5C mentality of act chio bo chio/ materialistic / angmoh-only / “singapore sux”/ I pretty so everyone sux/ bimbotic girls.
(which... seriously ar... I think many girls and women belong to in singapore. Especially those in media or business.)
So Aik henry and jason and I were talkin abt this lan jiao issue.
Singaporean men really dunno how to have sex meh?
The new paper columnist wrote 4 reasons why s’porean men cannot have sex. And all four is total nonsense and is actually just a bloody joke.
So we come out with our own 5Cs and prove that we are all actually very eligible. Very suave. Very most wanted. Confirm to get all those bimbo to bow at our feet.
And now I present our 5Cs.
C1
COMPUTER
Seriously ar. Who of you dn have computer? ..... WHAT?!?! YOU DUN HAVE!?!??!! Then wtf sia... how u live, man!!!! Go cyber café to do homework ar? HAHAHAH!!!!
If u like that then sorry... u lose one C. Thanks for playing. Bye bye.
C2
CARD.
Credit card? EZ Link card? Bus card? IC card? So what? what’s the difference? ALL GOT MONEY INSIDE WHAT?!?!?!?!
If you think credit card is something so big then I will come find you up in your tortoise mountain and stuff u in the longkang. U noe why? cos firstly ar... u ned to be of certain age to have credit card. Correct anot? You girl are only 17 u already wan to complain ur 16-year-old boyfriend no credit card. USE YOUR BLAIN can?! Then some may say that “but need to have a certain salary de maahhhzzzzz..”
I say, “So?!?!?!”
U noe are a lot of ppl say they aim to be millionaire. Joyce and Thena and I talk about this and we concluded that this is a very cheap dream.
SERIOUS!
U go calculate la how much your parents have been spending on u since u were born. Now count their car and the house and the angpow money.
See it now?
So now we must change mindset to become BILLIONAIRE!
C3
CONDOM
Duh! I know the teenage trend now is to go drive without seat belt but ..... that is just wrong.
And all you queen of Singapore dun think we men dunno ok! Some of u are just unfuckable because u are to FREAKING UGLY and u CANNOT KEEP UR MOUTH SHUT even in bed! But that’s just a few things.... we also know u all love to fill up your lao kang so u probably have STD... which makes C3 legitimate.
(but for same is DESPERATE to fill up their hole. I find that so sad.)
Pls ar... lets be fair here.
I know some of u guys will come and complain and say that with condom its “bo feeling bo shiok”.
BUT PREASE! THINK OF UNFoRTUNATE PPL!
I wear condom also no difference, can! With or without still bo feelin ok! Why? well that leads me to.....
C4
CUT.
Cut? Simi is cut?
Cut is when u lose 80 percent of your sex feeling when u slice away ur “sweater” too early in ur life.
Like for me.... 5 days. WTF LA!!!!! DIAOZ!
They say getting cut is hygienic. True. But only for some. Because some of we guys got this problem with our little brother. And that is he like to produce cheese.
ERXIN!
Doctors call this smegma. Like u noe.... magma which come from volcano. While volcano spit out magma.... you dirty little fella spit out cheese. 0.0
But then again smegma is evrybody have. Just that some produce too much. And start to stink up the room.
So then again.... getting cut is legitimate also. If u have this.. u get big big plus. Because u can last longer in bed... and look more cute sometimes. U dun have... its ok.... cos if not cut also I think is ok... I see my friend wan all look the same as mine lei. But I sibeh damn jealous cos they feel more than me! AARR!!!!
C5
And now we come to the last C..
This is the ultimate.
If you have this.... you damn eligible. You damn handsome. You damn hunky.
All girl will come for you.
And the last C is......
COCK!
These fan jian queens of Singapore ar... u have cock... all sure come. Nvm u short, long.. inverted, red, black, pink or blue... its ok. Anything to help them open their water bottle. Correct?
I know... cos a lot of girls last tim ewhen I still young... still muscle muscle.. girl always come ask me help them open water bottle. But actually now I think again ar.... wah liew.... wasted chance... I thought they really asking me open their Ice Mountain. A lot of them are now fucking CHIO !!!
So those are the 5Cs Aik, Henry, Jason and I were talkin abt. If you have ALL of those 5Cs... then I should say you will most wanted. All the bimbos of Singapore will come after you!
I have a message I would like to relay to all these Singaporean women.....
Come.... I read to you....
WAKE UP YOUR IDEA, CAN?!
Let’s see what happens to YOU when you cant find a man cos u’re just too high up in the clouds.
To some s’porean men out there. STOP PLAYING WITH YOUR CB COMPUTER AND LIVING IN YOUR OFFICE LA!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YOU, CAN U GET A LIFE?!
Yesterday’s New paper was on a certain theme.
“Singaporeans bo hua in bed”.
And u noe who take the blame?
SINGAPOREAN MEN.
Like... simi lan jiao understand!
The “queens of singapore” claim that singaporean men dunno how to please them. Dunno anything sweet. Dunno this dunno that. Dunno what is romantic.
Then some will emphasize that the ang moh men better. This onebetter. That onebetter.
So I say..... YOU LIKE ANG MOH PPL GO MIGRATE LA KNN!!!
I bet you ar a lot of this stupid queens so ugly and proud and confirm sure cannot get ang moh....... if they get also is the rejects... like fat ones. No hunks.
Singaporean men are good in bed okay!
Just ask me. I will show u. I wil tell u my fuck-ventures. muahaha.
Otherwise u might wan to ask hasrul. He so good in bed (touching lan lan and changing pampers) that old men like to scold him. He likes it rough, remember?
And he play dress up as nurse.
So anyways the stupid queens of Singapore only wan the 5Cs.
Which is what?
Condo... car.. credit card.... uh.... sth ...... and another sth.
Which is obviously a reflection of their super damn shallow mindset la.
So romantic = money?
NO!
Romantic is about seeing ur loved one happy happy while u over here in the mud, naked and bleeding?
NO!
Romantic is about~~~~>.......................................................
Being able to transport the two of you (three... if you are a two-timer) into a happy/loving separate, private world from eveyone else.
Correct anot?
We all love to escape reality. Away from world, problem.
aa.. this is romantic.
Agreed?
See..... I can see donald nodding his head. Cos he do this a lot with clara.... until it becomes a fairytale. LOL.
So anyways I damn doo lan with this stupid 5C mentality of act chio bo chio/ materialistic / angmoh-only / “singapore sux”/ I pretty so everyone sux/ bimbotic girls.
(which... seriously ar... I think many girls and women belong to in singapore. Especially those in media or business.)
So Aik henry and jason and I were talkin abt this lan jiao issue.
Singaporean men really dunno how to have sex meh?
The new paper columnist wrote 4 reasons why s’porean men cannot have sex. And all four is total nonsense and is actually just a bloody joke.
So we come out with our own 5Cs and prove that we are all actually very eligible. Very suave. Very most wanted. Confirm to get all those bimbo to bow at our feet.
And now I present our 5Cs.
C1
COMPUTER
Seriously ar. Who of you dn have computer? ..... WHAT?!?! YOU DUN HAVE!?!??!! Then wtf sia... how u live, man!!!! Go cyber café to do homework ar? HAHAHAH!!!!
If u like that then sorry... u lose one C. Thanks for playing. Bye bye.
C2
CARD.
Credit card? EZ Link card? Bus card? IC card? So what? what’s the difference? ALL GOT MONEY INSIDE WHAT?!?!?!?!
If you think credit card is something so big then I will come find you up in your tortoise mountain and stuff u in the longkang. U noe why? cos firstly ar... u ned to be of certain age to have credit card. Correct anot? You girl are only 17 u already wan to complain ur 16-year-old boyfriend no credit card. USE YOUR BLAIN can?! Then some may say that “but need to have a certain salary de maahhhzzzzz..”
I say, “So?!?!?!”
U noe are a lot of ppl say they aim to be millionaire. Joyce and Thena and I talk about this and we concluded that this is a very cheap dream.
SERIOUS!
U go calculate la how much your parents have been spending on u since u were born. Now count their car and the house and the angpow money.
See it now?
So now we must change mindset to become BILLIONAIRE!
C3
CONDOM
Duh! I know the teenage trend now is to go drive without seat belt but ..... that is just wrong.
And all you queen of Singapore dun think we men dunno ok! Some of u are just unfuckable because u are to FREAKING UGLY and u CANNOT KEEP UR MOUTH SHUT even in bed! But that’s just a few things.... we also know u all love to fill up your lao kang so u probably have STD... which makes C3 legitimate.
(but for same is DESPERATE to fill up their hole. I find that so sad.)
Pls ar... lets be fair here.
I know some of u guys will come and complain and say that with condom its “bo feeling bo shiok”.
BUT PREASE! THINK OF UNFoRTUNATE PPL!
I wear condom also no difference, can! With or without still bo feelin ok! Why? well that leads me to.....
C4
CUT.
Cut? Simi is cut?
Cut is when u lose 80 percent of your sex feeling when u slice away ur “sweater” too early in ur life.
Like for me.... 5 days. WTF LA!!!!! DIAOZ!
They say getting cut is hygienic. True. But only for some. Because some of we guys got this problem with our little brother. And that is he like to produce cheese.
ERXIN!
Doctors call this smegma. Like u noe.... magma which come from volcano. While volcano spit out magma.... you dirty little fella spit out cheese. 0.0
But then again smegma is evrybody have. Just that some produce too much. And start to stink up the room.
So then again.... getting cut is legitimate also. If u have this.. u get big big plus. Because u can last longer in bed... and look more cute sometimes. U dun have... its ok.... cos if not cut also I think is ok... I see my friend wan all look the same as mine lei. But I sibeh damn jealous cos they feel more than me! AARR!!!!
C5
And now we come to the last C..
This is the ultimate.
If you have this.... you damn eligible. You damn handsome. You damn hunky.
All girl will come for you.
And the last C is......
COCK!
These fan jian queens of Singapore ar... u have cock... all sure come. Nvm u short, long.. inverted, red, black, pink or blue... its ok. Anything to help them open their water bottle. Correct?
I know... cos a lot of girls last tim ewhen I still young... still muscle muscle.. girl always come ask me help them open water bottle. But actually now I think again ar.... wah liew.... wasted chance... I thought they really asking me open their Ice Mountain. A lot of them are now fucking CHIO !!!
So those are the 5Cs Aik, Henry, Jason and I were talkin abt. If you have ALL of those 5Cs... then I should say you will most wanted. All the bimbos of Singapore will come after you!
I have a message I would like to relay to all these Singaporean women.....
Come.... I read to you....
WAKE UP YOUR IDEA, CAN?!
Let’s see what happens to YOU when you cant find a man cos u’re just too high up in the clouds.
To some s’porean men out there. STOP PLAYING WITH YOUR CB COMPUTER AND LIVING IN YOUR OFFICE LA!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YOU, CAN U GET A LIFE?!
Posted by
Audi
Labels:
I did it for the lulz
RSS
