Saturday, December 31, 2005
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A recent post from rockson.blogspot.com.
i feel so glad now...
(taken from rockson.blogspot.com)
We close our eyes because we dowan to see This few day damn many report on NKF. The more I read the more I angry. KNNBCCB!!! Can go Las Vegges for holiday call it work! Your girl can from $1300 PR exec can earn until $12,500 cheebye dollar one month! Plus quit already get backpay and somemore can give business for her company!!! Fuck you understand!
Her service to that TT Durian lancheow face must be damn solid man! Only got one job in the world can get this kind of promotion and salary. That job is be call Mistress.
We are so stupid, Singaporeans. Everything we also believe. Look! Cannot be one! NKF is got gahmen support so how can be cheat people money!
Actually you want to fuck, I think Durian is not the only fucker to fuck. You want to find the real fuckers of the NKF cheater, it is those Board of Director, people like Richard Yong, Mathilda Chua (Durian favourite girl) and Alwyn Lim. You think they just give Durian power for fun one ah? Of course give Durian so many power is so that they also can enjoy.
The Richard Yong insurance company call Tenet Insurance can get business of $11,000 from NKF. The Mathilda Chua computer company can get computer business of few million dollar from NKF (the cheebye software also never write finish can get paid!). And the Alywn Lim who is also the NKF vice chairman and accountant never tell people he is some Senior Advicer of Shanghai Intelligence Consultants, some China HR company who got $55,000 business from NKF.
Raymond tell me that Alwyn Lim fucker got one PRC mistress in the Shanghai Intelligence Consultants. Nabei no wonder so easy to make money from NKF lah!
Next time remember, you want to get big business from dirty Board of Director of charity, make sure you know how to make his lancheow happy. Do for him the best stunt in the bed, and he will give you all the donation money you want. Look! I can balance my cheebye on your lancheow! Donate to my company! My neh nehs is so big, I lie down also they still stand sedia! Donate donate! See! I know how to suck your cock and rub my cheebye on your face! Donate some more!
10 cent for the poor and the sick. 90 cent for the chanpion fund raiser and cock sucker of the world.
I think Durian also stupid. Must be he join the Lau Goh camp then Lao Lee toolan and buay song, call the Strait Time dogs to go and tear Durian lan cheow also become cheebye hole.
If I am the new NKF, I will change my name now. Put one NEW in front is no use one. People see the name of NKF already want to pui chau nua, you still want to keep the name because of the first NKF CEO who is real good heart one? I think best is change name to No More Durai Kidney Federation, NMDKF. Like this maybe people will trust you again.
Another thing is sell away those expensive puacheebye chair the Durian gang buy for their diamond backside, sell away the beautiful fish tanks I see inside the kidney centre (so which Board of Director mistress is own the fish tank company one ah?), sell away all the golden tap and first class ticket, and use the money to pay back the poor fuckers who kena sue by Durian when they dare to say his bad things. They are the real heros, come and say Durians evil thing, but kena tekan by his lawyers.
Now we know they last time is telling the truth.
You know who else is sian by all this NKF problem? Mediacock. I tell you, the one who make million from NKF is them. Every year do all the charity show, they also earn good money. You think the Zoe Tay and the Fann Wong of the world like to do the cheebye stunt? Lan cheow ok! My friend who got Mediacock mistress tell me, every year, the Singapore star not just have to act their normal tv show, they also have to do all the cheebye stunt for the different charity show Mediacock make money from.
Most of the do stunt star is got no OT (not like NKF Durian and gang), no backpay, no extra money. Mediacock say you must do, means you must do. One year do so many stunt, the only one who make the money is not the actor or actress (and now not even the kidney patient). The one that make the money is Mediacock and NKF Durian gang.
Singaporean need to stop being stupid. We think everything is take care by Gahmen, even charity also will not cheat people. Now we know even Gahmen also can make mistake. The only people you can trust is yourself. So many big company and gahmen department involve, now then they catch NKF.
PWC: I dunno
National Charity Ministry: I dunno
Health Ministry: I dunno
Income Tax Ministry: I dunno
They dunno who fucking know?
NKF last time say, we are make ourself like gahmen, pure and white. Now we know they also follow gahmen style, pay themself high high pay, say themself is the Only Best Charity of Singapore, and use lawyer and court to tekan and sue people dare to say anything bad about them.
When you don't have transparent, the see-until-you-can-see-cheebye kind of transparent, NKF is what you get. But then Singaporean is use to not have transparent. How many of you have seen the gahmen cheebye? You think the gahmen dog call Strait Time will show for you? You can wait long long! Hahahahahahahaha!!!!
Friday, December 30, 2005
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Stupid infidels.
We’ve all seen how some nerdy bespectacled teens lugging guitars on their backs and boasting about their so-called churches go around and “spread the word of the Lord”... in an unprofessional way.
I say fuck them.
I don’t see how gigs and bands and drummers and guitarists and all that hula-jumba relate to the worship of God Almighty and all that He is. Its as if the celebration of music equals to worship. (dont give me that brotherly love excuse)
Charity? What charity? To fund the church to buy audio equipment? To build that extension to place a studio? How many percent goes to the real charity? 10 percent?
I was mad pissed with some of these kids who treat religion like business so I went up to one of them.
Haiz… where should I start. These teens are those who go around telling people that they did this and that in their church… they know the boom mic and the 48 channel audio mixer and betacams and HDV cams and drums and yawnzzzzzzzzzz………….. and they never once spoke of what Pastor Lee said in the sermon about boasting.
Yeah and when I pass them the equipment to handle… all I get is fucking bad audio… and I asked him to listen to it and he shouts back at me saying,” IT’S FINE LA, PUSSY!”
Fuck these people. Go shoot the sky instead.
My favorite question to ask these teens is,” What are the Holy Trinity and Nicene Creed and Evangelism?”
Would you believe that none of them even understood that? and they dare to go around "spreading the word".
But I must quickly add that Shaun knows. So you’re safe, buddy.
Then I ask,” Where in the world do you think Christianity came from?”
“America.”
"Europe"
LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL !!!!!!!!!!
Christianity came from the Middle East. Yup. That’s where “all terrorists come from.”
Israel, to be more exact, I think.
Then I have another question.
How is it that Churches here are so much richer than Hindu temples and Chinese temples and mosques?
I admit that some of these churches have great design and can be comparable to five star hotels sometimes. They are HUGE.
I went over to the church at the Methodist School of music (their lobby, at least) and im aghast and how much design has been given into the lawn... stairs... lobby… lifts…. Etc etc.
Then I look at the mosques in Singapore and I see the same old tree… some old grass… same old brown bricks (or some odd colours… blue and yellow.. eek…) and no freaking carpark at all.
Seriously…. Every Friday, near mosques, CARS ARE PACKED, PARKED ILLEGALLY on the roads… causing fucking jams and inconvenience to other road users. A few months ago This bus got stuck in front of the bus stop across the mosque because some faggot parked his car in front of the bus lane exit. The bus driver blasted his horn for the next 15 minutes till someone had to come down, cross to the road, over to the bus and stop traffic to allow the bus to reverse out.
Then the new mosque in sembawang... though with a huge (as in… HUGE…. The government could build another Takashimaya there…) behind it, no matter how tech the mosque looks like… NO FUCKING CAR PARK!!! Then the two lanes beside it get choked… and people start cursing the Muslims and their Friday prayers.
So as I was saying… ahem… where do these churches get their money to print out quality fliers, complete with professional designs printed on them, thousands of them, and then hold gigs and PARTIES (It’s A FREAKING CHURCH!!! YOU WORSHIP! NOT PARTY!) in the CBD area and all that blab la in MASSIVE proportions?!?!?! ( I'm looking at you people in CH....)
Well… the person who claimed he can work the boom, but was full of banana chocolate oil, said that the people give donations to the church every service.
"Some people, like my mother, give 50 dollars every week", he says.
Oh.. wow… and other places of worship don’t?
(i must state that the Methodist School of Music is a music school. duhz. So yeah that's nice.... teaching people to play music. Good money, i say.)
And what sense is there…. When a church states that in order for someone to worship in the church, they have to donate at least 10 percent of their income before they could do so. *
Places of worship? Yeah. Worship money, bloody infidels.
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i read this thing over and over again...... and i cant find anything that points out that I am against Chritianity. Well some people, like this anonymous bugger in the comments section, love putting words in my mouth. Either that or she's back at solely listening to her thoughts again.
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
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Aik was cool today. A day with him.
Friday, December 23, 2005
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Blog Closed.
*i cant believe the way some established organisations run.
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
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Guten Tag.
Diesen ist mein erste schreibe, in Deustch.
Jetzt, das production ist sehr gut.
Wir haben alle diesen geld, alle diesen laute, und alle support, aus Officer und schule.
Mein traue zum das Unit ist wunderbar-lich grosse. Aber, diesen ist das "last time" ich eine video production machen.
I hope things go well tomorrow.
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
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The production has run into a wall.
A very big one (no pun intended, i thank you)
Suddenly, my story is turning into real life.
Sunday, December 18, 2005
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The budget has been increased to SGD$900 dollars. And purely for the aesthetics, I’m putting in a hundred more to bring the total budget to a thousand dollars. Here is the list of names of people working for the project. - Audi
- Tharik
- Vicky
- Erwin
- Jason Goh
- Thena
- Joyce
- Justin (TBC)
- Charlene
- Sir Latiff
- Iman
- Charles
- Huda
- Aaron
- Jia Wei
- Jia Hui
- Jason Zhang
- Rastus
- Rasmus
- Zulhilmi
Here are the names of people I approached to be the main talent. - Sean
- Aik Hong
- Donald
- Mark (from St. Pat)
- Tharik
- Vicky
- Rongjun
- Zulhilmi
These are the names of those I approached for other roles - Henry
- Sze Aik
- Zhen Zhao
- Jia Cong
Here is how many things I destroyed in anger during the entire pre-production stage. - 5 boxes
- 1 wireless antenna
- 2 cds
- 20-over pieces of paper
- 8 rocks
- And a lot of punching on my Motorola DSL modem cos it didn’t wanna work. Now it is.
The sponsors: Sir Latiff Holiday Inn Kuching. (the hotel.. not my dad…)
Saturday, December 17, 2005
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15 December 2005 Less than a week left to the production stage. I’m terribly anxious. Up till now, I’ve threaded upon the heads of many indecisive, irresponsible fools. What have I learned so far? Ah yes. Think twice when asking kids you know to join in your production. There is the tendency of some people, which I know of as casual friends (as opposed to close friends), to make a fool out of the deal. They think that since there is a sense of familiarity between him and I, he could find it in himself to try and stick a boner up my ass an expect me to succumb to him. To give in to him. His demands. I believe that they know their own plans and schedules for trips and holidays and stuff more than anybody. Thus I see not why they still accept the offer. I thought holidays were planned weeks ahead? I have, indeed, become very fussy over the details of this project. I expect every single sentence, every single letter, to be written out, shown, the way I want them to. I want a specific type of person for my main character. A specific action. Specific way of speech. I tend to make no compromises whatsoever, so far. I take advice from a selected few only; people who know what to do. Otherwise, I’m deaf. I won’t be surprised to be called a “tyrant” on set. But all the reason to be. I see not anyone else who is taking any effort on perfecting a certain effect I’m tying to achieve for the shoot, though much discussion has been made over it. I see not anyone else who is looking for locations. Or talents (except Jia Hui. He managed to get me my main character). Or even basic needs such as a schedule. I see not anyone else engaging in an active discussion with authorities of the school. Am I the only one, among other people who are somehow related to North View, which takes some bloody initiative in his position? Or are we all just a bunch of anti-social, “self-sufficient”, proud freeloaders? And don’t get angry on me. There must be a reason why all three of the main characters ARE NOT from North View, right? Wouldn’t you think silly reason such as,” I’m afraid of girls”, which was, really, the excuse given to me by a 16-year-old kid, be something? I believe I have done a lot of asking to be able to justify my opinions. I feel so relieved, now that my friends from Ngee Ann have agreed on helping me out. At least, now, when I speak of mise-en-scene, at least 5 of my crew would understand. Now I understand Justin when he said I was working with “kids”. 17 December 2005 Once more, the production is crumbling, on the cast side. Our to-be main character has pulled out again, the reason stemming for the lack of forethought or looking at his bloody schedule. This will be the last time I’m working with kids. The cast list saw more empty slots today. Four roles left to fill up, out of maybe 15. I knew I should’ve done this earlier; I called up the “Old Birds” of the unit and they are actually more than willing to perform. But of course, I drilled them with many “Have you checked your schedule?” questions. Still, we have no main talent. The rifle smoke effect has been perfected. Nothing more than a hose and syringe and a secret ingredient to complete the effect. Monday will, hopefully, be the day everything related to discussions with Captain May, Mr. Yeo and Sir would be decided. I feel so bad for having Sir fork out the entire budget of the production (600 bucks, and we’re over-running) so I’m all out to find sponsors for the project. I’m planning to raise another 300 dollars. God bless. And Merry Christmas. *and I would like to publicly thank Jason Goh, the guy who saved my behind from a pack of blood-hungry mainland Chinese last year, for agreeing to be part of the crew.
Thursday, December 15, 2005
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... are falling where they should.
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
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Sunday, December 11, 2005
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Update. I’ve finally found the time to sit down and blog about the current progress of the NCC video. I had a few unique experiences over the past few days. I got shot at with a revolver (went momentarily blind and deaf as well) I got to carry a film camera. I earned the trust of Sir Latiff in a form of 600 dollars from his own pocket to fund the project. I learnt about the general unhappiness of “behind the scenes” people on the way Project Pilot turned out to be. ------------------------------------------- This whole preproduction process has gotten on my nerves. I am indeed angry at the general incompetence of people who have AGREED WITH ENTHUSIASM to be involved with this project, with the knowledge that they are getting paid for what they do and the fullest support of a very dedicated officer, yet, they make NO EFFORT whatsoever to help IMPROVE the project, either by means of giving opinions of the plot, setting a time and day for the proposed shooting dates or even turning up for production meetings with people from ESTABLISHED production companies to discuss important issues like equipment rental or special effects, which is SERIOUS, and really cant be done with one person only. Not only do I have to squeeze the juice out of them, I had to explain to them in a way that I am doing now just to emphasize the need for cooperation in a production team. This has indeed gone too far. I just got off the phone with our star-to-be. He has declined to participate in the project with reasoning that it does not fit his schedule (we’re shooting on the 22nd, night and 23rd) but suggested the shooting be done on the EVE OF NEW YEAR. I just cannot allow one man, to halt the entire production team (cast, crew, sponsors) of FIFTY men, just to suit his schedule, on a day which everyone else WOULDN’T come. Thus, my current “if you can’t make time for it, too bad” approach to people I am sourcing for the project. This project is not failing, really. It’s just going slow. The logistics side has been settled. I’ve worked a price for the rental of equipments from Cinegear Pte. Ltd, which includes an entire XL2 package, a tracked dolly, a 2000W and 300W light, reflector, boom microphone and a rain jacket for the XM2, which amounts to a total cost of SGD$280 PER DAY (and we’re shooting for two days), 40 dollars cheaper than the original price. Today I sat down with the special effects guy. We talked. And he showed me a sample of his expertise; he loaded a revolver, and shot me. There was a loud bang. Smoke. And muzzle flash. Price of that? Momentary blindness and a total numbness in the ears. And a jerky camera shot. No one died. Nothing. Then he showed me his arsenal of rifles and machineguns and handguns. Not only is this guy, Jimmy Low from Stunt Productions, very dedicated, he MAKES all his stuff, including gunpowder, and has a license to boot. Now, I think his 1,500 dollar package is actually dirt cheap for blank firing guns and body hits and explosions. However, I cannot fit this into the NCC video. This will only result in a rushed job, lousy cinematography and a truckload of arguments between the crew, cast and special effects guy. Never. I have no intentions on seeing my production turning to be an event of disorganized hopeless bunch of “aspiring” filmmakers trying to make a “movie”. I have a standard to maintain as an FSV student, as a person who has been looking at the world through a viewfinder for more than three years, almost non-stop. (I learnt cinematography and technical works of the camera on my own, from the ground up. It was not easy for a 15 year old. So don’t tell me I’m a loghead. I know I have much more to learn anyways.) I won’t be surprised to lose more than half of my crew if I were to start another production, even if it has a budget of three thousand dollars and they get a share of that budget (I’m actually working it out soon). And I should be paid, at least five thousand dollars, for a project like this whereby I am the scriptwriter, the director, the producer, the editor, the cameraman, the cinematographer and the gaffer. And that is not even the industrial price, believe me. I asked. *storywriters can earn two thousand bucks for their story. That’s for the average type. Let’s not talk about “The Usual Suspects” kind; that’ll blow us away. Thus I see no reason why I can be considered to be priced way “above (my) standard” when I charge four hundred dollars for a day shoot (this is only as a cameraman. Not editor. Not director.). It is only logical to check industrial prices first, and then compare your findings against freelance videographers. Did you know that they charge a hundred dollars PER TAPE for editing? and don’t hope of getting more than 30 minutes out of a tape. Not even close. We used two tapes for a five minute video. So calculate, people. *Henry agreed to be my model again. He always saves me from trouble. I’m giving him forty bucks (with extras, naturally) for his service. Sometimes the best people we know are right under our noses. Not those with their heads high up in the clouds. 
Thursday, December 08, 2005
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Dear Cheryl,
Here I am, rewriting a letter to you. I found out today that what I wrote to your the last time, about how i changed, was totally out of point and far from the objective of the question given to me in class. The proper question here is; How have you changed me?
Plenty of times, people from my childhood have changed me. But you, Cheryl, you are still the one I remember the clearest. So clear, I think I can feel you beside me.
The very moment Aizzat came up to me that day about what had happened to you, I felt as if I was pulled up and away from the universe by force. It was painful. I was shocked. I was angry. I went through a moody rainbow of emotions. I believe it was that moment that rewired my nervous system and called for a total revolution of principles. And the very fact that, even till now, I have yet to discover your grave, my principles have stood strong.
Because of you Cheryl, my perception of love has changed. I am, in fact, afraid to love. I am afraid of going through that already familiar feeling of hopelessness and distraught. I have developed a phobia. A phobia of losing a woman. Your death has influenced frequent lapses of pain and suffocation whenever I see a person I have feelings for. I am scared. Truly. I cannot afford, I dont want, I hate, to see another friend die when I am still alive.
I became numb to feelings for the longest time ever, slowly regaining them in my legs recently. You have driven me to protect my friends, no matter what the outcome, support them and praise them to the high heavens and condemn anyone who speaks bad of them. I have taken plenty of emotional bruises and caused many as well, just to protect my people. You have taught me life's fragility. Life's unpredictibility and life's inevitable end. I have pledged to live my life to its fullest, and help others do the same. And i have kept it ever since. You were the driving force. The great woman that controls the power of a man.
I have slapped myself out of nerdhood and into a different class of my own. I became twisted. I have twisted principles, thanks to you. I am pissed at your jokes. I am pissed at you flirting with me! I am pissed that I can still feel your hands warm in mine. I am pissed that I could still feel your presence whenever I lean on a wall...... which pretty much explains why I always lean on them. It has become a habit. That was the last position we were in before you left; we leaned on our sides, arms crossed and facing each other. Sometimes, when I talk to people in that position, I SEE YOU.
However, I am still not lost. I walk out of the challenge more immune to hurt and provoking people. But I will always be scarred by you. I dont know whether to love you or hate you.
Regards,
Audi
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
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Monday, December 05, 2005
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Saturday, December 03, 2005
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Good day,
First off, i would like to express my most sincere appreciation that you, a visitor of this blog, would stop by, even if your stay lasts a second or a quarter of an hour long.
I come with a message: Mein Bereich will cease to be updated until the end of the month, earliest, or end of February, latest. The reason behind this is the overwhelming number of assignments and projects I have received from school and those inspired by the visitors of Mein Bereich. One example is the NVAU narrative video which, to my surprise, is receiving an enthusiastic feedback from the community; NVAU itself, the Officers, the cadets, the principal, the guys, Jia Hui, Sean and Hai Ting.
One of the main resons why I continue producing videos and images and posts is because of you, the readers. i feel it my duty to provide humour, insights, anger and entertainment for everyone that conciously clicks on a link to Mein Bereich or types in the address in the browser. Thus my refrain from "calender activity" posts. However, i must disappoint you for now.
I shall return, once in a while, with images, to keep Mein Bereich going.
i assure you, i shall also bring to you videos to entertain, once they are completed.
Thus, I end my message and Merry Christmas!
Regards,
Audi
2nd December 2005.
Friday, December 02, 2005
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Thursday, December 01, 2005
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ok tonight was weird.
Let me start off by expressing my thanks to Henry for agreeing to come down to my little "studio" for a few frames of him. The film is gonna be sent for development today.
Then... i went off.. with him... he went home on his tootoo bike... i went to develop my other roll of film.
So i got home... my sister already came back. Okay... so my aircon has been switched off, the front door has been double locked and my room door has been left ajar; a big no no because my room then turns warm (it's the warmest of the rooms, really. Firstly its that stupid tree blocking my window and the fact that i have so much objects in my room.)
So she saw my little studio set up; grey backdrop, one 40W light from IKEA and a lower voltage one from somewhere, a tripod and the school's F55.
Guess what happened?
She plopped down infront of my backdrop and asked for a few shots to be taken -.-
So maybe today is the first time since primary 6 that i actually had a real conversation with her. :S
I gave her four frames.
Then she started commenting on getting better lights and better backdrop etc etc....
Apparently she's tied to a modelling agency. :s
eew.
Before she left the room, she said,"Next time i want a full roll of film just on me."
and she also wanted a portfolio.
"Money?"
"I'm your sister and you still ask for money?!"
Well... business is business. I should get paid for my time in that kind of uncomfortable situation.
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THE NEXT DAY (today, yesterday's tomorrow, tomorrow's yesterday.)
Northpoint. That's where everything started.
It was around 6 or so today... i got back after having some really awful and dry scones at Coffee Bean while writing "Drafted In" (title's changing, though.)
I gave the lady my roll of film to develop, asked for her to print it on CD (she was startled at my request, really. "Print on CD".). So i gave he rmy particulars, she gave me my ticket. i was about to leave when i asked her if she could speed up the process. Turns out that they do have an "Express" service. With just an addition of two dollars or so, I got my film back in an hour. I could have it in half the time but 5 dollars more is too much.
Got the pics forty minutes later (i was impatient), and my, was i filled with adrenaline when i saw my pictures on the little boxes supplied with the CD.
Got back home, happened to be walking behind my little Wei Shan in GV before that, and watched my pictures in full view on the monitor.
Here they are (some of them)
And introducing (for the first time ever).....
This model wannabe. -.-
This has go to be the worst roll of fil ive ever used. It's an ISO 200, something ive never used before, and i have plenty of underexposed shots with TEN FRAMES unable to be developed. :S
Okay that's it. Sleepy time...
(My original intention was black and white portrait shots, though. Oh oh.. and that Baleno jacket in Northpoint cries out my name!!)
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
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Tuesday, November 29, 2005
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Another beautiful day.
Sarah's birthday, today. I wish you the best, Sarah. Finally... the last few of us have reached adulthood. Now let's await your 45th birthday. =p
btw... had a great time with Henry tonight, eh?
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A call from Aik this afternoon. Seems like the guys are going for Clara's chalet. I didnt wanna go, initially, cause I have school the next day.
Well im glad i went anyways.
(and i saw SHERYL!!!! LOL LOL!!! i'm fainting~~ )
Such a sweet time. All the way till 1am (now).
Jason reappeared. I am indeed delighted. He has agreed to come for this friday;s weekly gatherings. I hope to see him from then on.
With Jason, recollection of the old days ensues.
No words (that i can use) can express the deepest feelings I have to see the people I love an adore for 5 years come back together again after long periods of absence.
It's even more tear-jerking to see that they have matured in thinking and reasoning and looks.
I will most defnitely be depressed, long time, if one of them decides to leave... to leave this little cult. This gang.
Ive spent more time and money on them then i have with anyone else, be it my girlfriends or family.
-------------------------------------------------------------
I;m in love.
Deeply.
But love, to me....
....... well.... I''m not a good lover. maybe good in bed but....
I shouldnt start a relationship. Right?
I'm just too haphazard. Too fickle. Too spontaneous.
I''m afraid no one could keep up with me. Not even Javis. How else would you expect a younger.... calm... pretty... slim.... girl..... keep up?
I long for the day i could sing and dance and role play with a woman, at home, in public, in bed, with a wedding ring to tie us together.
I admit. I took up performing arts so that i could do these to that special woman who might plop down one day.
Singing. Dancing. Acting. Dress Up.
oh~~~~ ....
I am so in love.....
BUT NO!
My heart shall remain cold towards affections of this! But for what? For I am too proud of a man to give in to women. A chauvanist! I hug women whenever i feel like it, not when they need it! I express feigned love for the heck of it, to see how they;ll react, at the drop of a hat, not because i really mean it! I drop heaps of cash right infront of her to "buy" her love, not to earn it through simplistic, honest means!
.......
.... but i';m sure... someone... some woman... would change all that.
because i know. ive seen her. Smelt her. Touched her. Waved at her. Spoke to her. Laughed at her. Laughed with her. Sticked my tongue out at her.
This... woman... i so adore.
I'm in love.....
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EDIT.
I jsut had to add more.
I liek the way how Henry, Aik, Tharik, Viky, Jason and Don and the rest of our friends e.g G4 and erwin come together as the two little girls turn 17.
it's just one of those times i can feel cooperation across many types of relationships (No, Swee Swee (Ryan... lol..) staring at my balls is not testimony to us having a relationship. =p ) just to bring forward something for the birthday girls.
Next year, when i turn 18, when i can drive, I'll drive. I'll lay myself down, be a chauffeur for them. For their honeymoon. For their dates. For their secret meetings. And ill even throw in my suit and white gloves and pilot's hat as well. Not forgetting my polished belt buckle and leather shoes from Italy ( or Spain... :S). Now, if only my Altis was black.... Champagne is just so icky...
I'll pretty much do anything, really. Almost. Still not so keen on the "eat shit, jump off the building" stuff though..
Sunday, November 27, 2005
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If you can read this, the week of intense photography has ended.
Some of you may be expecting something extravagant at the last day of this event. But. no.
All i can say is that whenever i look through the viewfinder, i get to appreciate more on what is already there for us.
Too dreamy? To prophetic? well...
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I spent the day free of the camera by my side.
I dressed myself up comfortably. Got out of the house when i wanted. Did things whenever i felt like it. Slowed my pace along the street, and enjoyed everything that was around me.
I smiled at the bus driver. I waved at the lady sitting in the bus stop when she kept staring at me. I whistled around the whole of Yishun. I hopped. I twirled. I flicked a coin. I walked backwards. I hopped backwards. I sang. I made faces. I put my hand in my pockets. I am in love.....
Such a wonderful day. Clara received her birthday present from me. Sarah got her dad's item back. Tharik got his soccer video back plus Doom 3 to boot. Javis called. I sipped my musroom soup, bought at 7-11, slowly, while leaning against a pillar, beside a road, waiting for the traffic light. The simple things i can do that makes me happier than having famous people around me or having 6 million dollars in my bank or living in a hotel or having six condominiums or having a new phone or speaking lawyer/poetic english.
I spent the long walk back home in the night whistling, and strafing and hopping. Yes, people looked. But i bowed and waved and smiled at them. And i continued on. No one could stop me. The street was mine.
I'm in love....
Saturday, November 26, 2005
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The second last day of intense photographing.
I guess the time is just right, i can see the disadvantages of digital photography emerging and the height of my photographing techniques is starting to shallow off.
So i got out of the house today around one, dressed in slippers and a faded shirt with the S1 Pro in my hands.
and walked around in the drizzle taking photos at really familiar places. At the same time i went location scouting for my new war video,"Drafted In".
We start off here. North View sits, seemingly harmlessly, at the right end of the horizon.
Then thee's the drain at near to the newly built Yishun Street 31. That new street destroyed the very beauty of the area; forests, and a thick mist to drive through early int he morning. I remember last year when i was always amazed, sitting in the front seat of the car, whenever that thick mist came into view. Sometimes rainbows would form and sunrays would form really holistic patterns.
Destruction, once again. This used to be a place where there were thick foliage of tall grass. I came here, along with a few cadets, to pluck grass to be used for our "sniper camouflage" for CCA open house 2003. Now it's all gone.
Then off i went for location scouting. First stop....
Yishun Park.
I never noticed this in Safra...
This is where digital photography is at a disadvantage. It is just impossible for the rigid make up of pixels to be able to detect slight gradual changes in colour and tone and brightness and contrast and everything like that. So what i got in the shadows was just a hint of the beams, then black. And on film, you dont get bleeding of the sky... i.e. the white sky bleeds into the edges of the subject. If you look back on the previous post, there's this pic of mitch with shaun in the background, which was shot on film. Note how the light falling on Mitch's shoulders is accurately captured. With digital, we'd see a halo effect instead.
That;s it.
wait... that's it!?!?
yeah.. that's it. I have 25 more photos which were taken today, but they're nothing special. :)
.. except, maybe this.
this is where Vis and i would walk, to his house. I'd pick him up.. i'd send him home.. we'd be walking along here in the middle of the night... sleeping over.. .... .... Yeah and it is on this road that I last had a real conversation with him, in person. :(
Oh and guess what, i was walking down the stairs, leading to my house, and after fumbling through ll my pockets, i cant find me key!
but i walked towards my door anyways.
and gasp! there was my key, hanging on that heavy heavy duty silver lock! lol...
I was out for two hrs today as well. First thing i did when i got into the house was point my camera into the living room, so in case an intruder appears, snap!
Well noone came in, so into my room i went. tra la la la...
Friday, November 25, 2005
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Two hours of school today, the usual. So I ended at 11am... where to next?
I'm proud to announce that the next war video is under pre-production stage now. Next year will be a special year for NVAU in terms of media development. Next year, the unit will be able to boast FOUR new videos, almost entirely fiction (meaning.. i get to direct what happens onscreen.. instead of plain old shots after shots of marching and crawling....zzz).
There will be a five minutes video for the CCA Open House, the usual.
Then a 10 to 20 minutes short film, that has been given complete liberty in terms of creativity and artistry (meaning, i can have the entire action sequence i've imagined onscreen).
A modified corporate video for the unit (or whole of NCC, if i have the time).
and lastly, a video to commemorate NVAU's 10th anniversary, which will be shown in our own hotel function somewhere in the city (now i can wear my suit...)
Ive talked to Sir about payments and all and he agrees to find people to help fund the project. and he was talking in the hundreds.
Ive already thought of my position; cameraman cum director cum scriptwriter cum art director. lol.
But then again, i'm willing to give some of my positions away to more worthy people (though i'll be holding on very tightly to the scriptwriting and cameraman position.)
and all these happened in North View, so which means, pictures from there. Today's aim was to take pictures of places people are familiar about and take them in such a way that they've never seen it before.
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Friday gathering again. just a short one this time. I'm leaving for Johor soon. Donald was around today, Viky cant make it; he was at the temple again.
Dinner at Long John, teased a cute girl, played pool at SAFRA, saw a real nice sunset (and took the oppurtunity to photograph it), walked my little brother, Sze Aik halfway home, and here I am.
I'm telling you, I'm really going nuts with this Friday gathering; it's really a time i can loosen my tie, unbuckle my belt, ruffle up the hair and walk around with an erection (lol).
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Pictures.
Shah eating in the canteen. He was so "shy"....
...but i was persistent.. and this is what came out when he hid behind the bags... lol...
Void deck outside NVSS. ooo... can we just feel the doom?
Yellow...
Green... i mean.. red...
The loudhailer at the concourse.
The stairs of doom many of us had to climb to reach the cell they call "classrooms".
Chipping of the paint on the rails infront of the office. We've all touched that chipping, havent we?
The sunset. Aww... taken from Safra.
Pool!!! and aik peeks...
Go, Aik!
Sexy Henry-Sarah's-boyfriend takes aim.... but i wanted to intensify the overall feeling of this pic so...
i cropped the picture. Then noise was added...
Oh noes! Tharik shouting!!
Just an everyday shot... or is it? watch the expressions and tell a story.
Henry aims again.
Then off i go home....
Passin by golden lights...
and fascinated by them.
Okay the end. I have to run off now. see ya! (omg did i just say,"see ya?")
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and i saw Sheryl today!!! OMG OMG!!!! i'm fainting. -.-
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