Things took a sudden turn of events over the past few weeks. I've skipped a lot of it in the previous post.
I don't know how to describe it but i find the sudden climb in luck/fortune/or whathaveyou to be particularly creepy. I'm about to touch on subject many would consider "nuts" or "alternative" but that is that.
I spend a lot of my time over at the Whampoa office, sitting around. After I left for Mediacorp Uncle Jimmy hasn't been doing anything much. It's like suddenly all the jobs stopped. But we both reasoned that it was just that season in the film industry where everything is still being planned and no shoots are happening yet. There was plenty of time for me to sit around cleaning my fingernails.
It's been about a year since I joined Stunt Production and I've known fairly well of Uncle Jimmy's traits. There are times where he suddenly changes his tone and starts talking about things that have no relation whatsoever to whatever we were talking about moments before. Rationally, I think it's just his daddy-talk. I am pretty messed up outside of work... smoking, drinking, and pretty much always alone. But not lonely. I always enjoyed being alone. And I always feared it... because that's the time I will mess things up pretty badly.
It was a few days after my birthday and Uncle Jimmy looked at me. We were having coffee at a coffeeshop in Ang Mo Kio when I told him what I noticed that morning... that my face somewhat changed. I told him he was right that after 20 a lot of things will grow and change. But then he looked again and he told me to work hard for this whole decade. After that, things will fly.
I had this inkling that I've been too lucky my whole life. There will be a point of time things will go down. I believe in karma, yin and yang, and stuff like that. So I was in fact looking out for the time everything will slip. I just didn't know when.
Last month, my sister pulled me to the corner one night. My father was on the phone in the living room. That whole week I noticed that no one was home. I didn't know where my parents where, and my sister was off working. It didn't bother me because I'm always looking for ways to find money and thinking of my next "project". Then she laid the bomb - that my father lost quite a wad of cash in some fucked investments with Sunshine Empire.
I didn't bother much too. Story of my life, isn't it. I estimated it to be about 13k to 50k. Even so, it's not my money, and I was pretty much planning already what to do if things go really bad.
This whole investment thing bothered 3/4 of the family since the start. And my sister is my only sibling. I never understood why the fuck does he want to invest in an MLM. Probably because he just adores my cousin who's working in there driving his fancy BMW and a girlfriend I really didn't like hanging around. Sometimes I think he'd be happy if that was his son, earning tens of thousands, dressed up in shirts and pants instead of earning little to no pay, hanging around with an old man and dressed up like he's going fishing. I think it also had something to do with the racism thing... which I find hypocritical too.
It was only last week did I find out how much was lost. It was close to a half a million dollars. That's a shitload of cash. My sister was the one who asked for the numbers. I sat there, slightly disappointed, and there we were sitting on a table full of food in a restaurant in Eunos and just a fwe minutes ago he was thinking of adding another storey to the terrace house we don't even officially own yet. Needless to say, I was pissed out of my mind.
Uncle Jimmy knew way beforehand that my father was investing a ton of money. He has that intuity. Or life experience. He mentioned about it beginning of the year after I related to him how unhappy I was that cash was being shoveled down to shit.
It's just amazing how things suddenly take a turn. When it comes, it comes. When it goes, it goes. And great timing too. At this point of time I can't wait to go for National Service. It's a source of income, no matter how tiny the pay might be, but I'm fine with crashing at friends' place just to save cost. I also can't wait to get away from my father, no matter how much of a bastard I sound. I've seen since the time he retired to now that his health has gone downhill and he's going a bit nutty in the head. I don't know if he realizes it and I talked to a few people about it and decided it was best if he started working again. But we never had a good conversation-relation so the only time we could confront each other was in the car. I gave him a piece of my mind, trying to be nice in tone but sharp in words.
"You have to start working. Why don't you start working?" I asked.
"Why? Why can't I retire early? I've worked so hard."
"I'm not asking you to work hard. Just enough to keep yourself sane. At this age you're gonna go under menopause. You'll go senile if you sit around doing nothing."
He changed the subject and started talking to my mom. So whatever.
One of the reasons why I'm still over at Stunt Production is because of all the "creepy" things that go around in the Whampoa office. I used to be terrified whenever I start feeling things crawling up my back but at this place it was different. Uncle Jimmy is committed when he prays. Everyday he cleans the altar and I observe the process. When he prays it is deep and concentrated. Until now i still don't understand why my parents say if I don't pray, I'll be like the Chinese, who "don't pray". If anything, I think it takes much more effort for Chinese Buddhists to pray than Muslims.
But religion is another issue and I have a strong objective regarding it. i won't cover that now.
Uncle Jimmy always tells me I am blessed somewhat. Born lucky. And this will always be with me. I guess that's nice to hear. Out of respect, I do burn jossticks to the God of Health, God of Earth and the Thai Buddha whenever I come over to the office. I say again, out of RESPECT. With the amount of religious paranoia hanging around today it's hard to keep them from nagging at your feet.
You could say this has helped a bit in luck. Uncle Jimmy and I have seen our fair share of things happening around the office. Sometimes when we're present together. It's an amazing thing for me. It just reassures me that this world is so big and deep. I may be wrong, but if it helps me keep calm and not fret about so many non-issues in life, why not just let it be? It's just like religion in a way, except for the fact I'm not forcing it down another person's throat.
Throughout this recent times I keep having thoughts that linger around for far longer than they should. Deja Vus happen a fuckload of often lately after I left Mediacorp. I keep thinking of earthquakes and floods in the coming week. Maybe it's the wacky sticks i've been smoking. Or i havent been getting much action lately.
I was practicing my guitar one day after waking up from a weird dream. I hate having those dreams. They call it lucid dreaming.. where you are able to control whatever the hell you do in your dreams. Everytime I wake up from one of this I get this throbbing headache and I feel so tired overall. For a few weeks I could only think of one person: my friend Javis.
He and I have gone through our ups and downs over the years in secondary school. It was mostly up, and I loved him like crazy. We'd drift closer and apart every now and then - closer when he's single and apart once he gets a girlfriend. We'd share in lots of crap together, and very often I find that he understands my jokes far more than anyone else. Everything bonded together rather easily. But our ties were severed one time in Year One when I used him for entirely selfish reasons to gain an advantage. It was not pleasant at all though it was a silent departure. I never heard from him again, even though our blocks were nearby in Poly and the next time I heard of him, he got kicked out of school and was working in part-time jobs. Sad, really. In retrospect, he's the one I'd consider hardworking and intelligent. The ones I hang out with after that were selfish idiots. I'd consider them so selfish that they'd rather fellate themselves rather than have someone do it for them. I'm glad they're gone now.
I'd meet Javis every now and then at his work place at Orchard Rd. A little cafe called Far Coast. He's not working there now. When he left the place I didn't even know. After that I received news that he was in a band as a singer with some old friends from secondary school and shortly after left for National Service. By then I was about to finish Year Two in Poly. Time, really, flies.
I never heard from him anymore for the longest time until just a day ago. Have you ever had that kind of feeling that someone is about to call you, or sms you, or whatever and it really comes? Sometimes I wonder is it because I'm thinking of them first, or that they were thinking of me. It's happen a lot lately. And I was thinking of Javis the whole week for a VERY long time. When things like this start happening I get very careful and sensitive because if anything, it's not right.
I was having a meeting at 12am over at Hoods Inc. in River Valley Road regarding the shoot in May. It was a long meeting. I was spaced out that time... because I've been doing some experiments at home in regards to hypnosis, sound and the brain (binaural beats) so I probably messed something up there. Some might ask "Where the hell do you come up with this stupid ideas?!" The fact is, I'm as clueless as you.
Javis sms-ed me when I was getting restless. It's been a year, and I was really happy. He wanted to meet me "for a smoke". I used this as an excuse to leave the meeting because by the looks of it, it'll be on till 4am in the morning. If anyone from Hoods reads this, I am terribly sorry.
I took a cab down to his place and called him down. We hugged and punched each other in a friendly manner and got to the smoking. If there was some dope and a bottle of Jim Beam I guarantee it will be a fucking awesome night. I knew something was up the moment I saw him and I found out soon after. Apparently someone was after him i was asked to help him on it. Immediately I was thrown back to what Uncle Jimmy mentioned. I won't reveal much since the coal is still pretty hot but let me say it was freaking accurate.
The twist here in the story, that I find extremely weird is that Javis has been to Uncle Jimmy's place when he was just a young boy. Apparently his father and Jimmy had some ties there. Javis told me about it before, back when I first met Uncle Jimmy in 2004, before I even applied for Poly. And I totally forgot.
I agreed to help Vis a bit. And we hung around catching up.
Then he said a few bits of line that creeped the hell out of me.
They were:
"If it's mine, it's mine."
"When the time is right, it will come."
"This kind of money is not meant to be eaten."
"Audi you are very lucky."
These are the exact four lines that Uncle Jimmy always preaches to me. It's like my mantra. It blew my mind off. It could all just be one major coincidence with no meaning at all. But damn, that was fucking cool.
We hung around abit more, i showed him a bit of my kungfu training, and we parted our ways.
Within this few month my life has taken a major turn. I'm more at ease, I spend time for myself and spend more time for work. My savings are growing and I'm fine with staying single. I've reasoned with myself that having a relationship probably is not the best thing for me now.
A lot of the people I meet, and some of my friends, look at me as I tell my war stories, and they always say the same thing - that I am lucky/chose the right course/leeched of someone else and pretty much have settled down.
The fact is, I'm less stable as I seem. I'm constantly rushing for something, that I have no idea what, and it probably is just my excuse to keep myself sane... like a drug. It's exciting. Every corner lays a gem. There will be the ups and downs... some minor.. some major.. some uncomparable. I might just be climbing now, or I'm already at my peak, I don't know. I could go higher, or I could stumble and fall over. And I love the prospect of both.
I don't know how to describe it but i find the sudden climb in luck/fortune/or whathaveyou to be particularly creepy. I'm about to touch on subject many would consider "nuts" or "alternative" but that is that.
I spend a lot of my time over at the Whampoa office, sitting around. After I left for Mediacorp Uncle Jimmy hasn't been doing anything much. It's like suddenly all the jobs stopped. But we both reasoned that it was just that season in the film industry where everything is still being planned and no shoots are happening yet. There was plenty of time for me to sit around cleaning my fingernails.
It's been about a year since I joined Stunt Production and I've known fairly well of Uncle Jimmy's traits. There are times where he suddenly changes his tone and starts talking about things that have no relation whatsoever to whatever we were talking about moments before. Rationally, I think it's just his daddy-talk. I am pretty messed up outside of work... smoking, drinking, and pretty much always alone. But not lonely. I always enjoyed being alone. And I always feared it... because that's the time I will mess things up pretty badly.
It was a few days after my birthday and Uncle Jimmy looked at me. We were having coffee at a coffeeshop in Ang Mo Kio when I told him what I noticed that morning... that my face somewhat changed. I told him he was right that after 20 a lot of things will grow and change. But then he looked again and he told me to work hard for this whole decade. After that, things will fly.
I had this inkling that I've been too lucky my whole life. There will be a point of time things will go down. I believe in karma, yin and yang, and stuff like that. So I was in fact looking out for the time everything will slip. I just didn't know when.
Last month, my sister pulled me to the corner one night. My father was on the phone in the living room. That whole week I noticed that no one was home. I didn't know where my parents where, and my sister was off working. It didn't bother me because I'm always looking for ways to find money and thinking of my next "project". Then she laid the bomb - that my father lost quite a wad of cash in some fucked investments with Sunshine Empire.
I didn't bother much too. Story of my life, isn't it. I estimated it to be about 13k to 50k. Even so, it's not my money, and I was pretty much planning already what to do if things go really bad.
This whole investment thing bothered 3/4 of the family since the start. And my sister is my only sibling. I never understood why the fuck does he want to invest in an MLM. Probably because he just adores my cousin who's working in there driving his fancy BMW and a girlfriend I really didn't like hanging around. Sometimes I think he'd be happy if that was his son, earning tens of thousands, dressed up in shirts and pants instead of earning little to no pay, hanging around with an old man and dressed up like he's going fishing. I think it also had something to do with the racism thing... which I find hypocritical too.
It was only last week did I find out how much was lost. It was close to a half a million dollars. That's a shitload of cash. My sister was the one who asked for the numbers. I sat there, slightly disappointed, and there we were sitting on a table full of food in a restaurant in Eunos and just a fwe minutes ago he was thinking of adding another storey to the terrace house we don't even officially own yet. Needless to say, I was pissed out of my mind.
Uncle Jimmy knew way beforehand that my father was investing a ton of money. He has that intuity. Or life experience. He mentioned about it beginning of the year after I related to him how unhappy I was that cash was being shoveled down to shit.
It's just amazing how things suddenly take a turn. When it comes, it comes. When it goes, it goes. And great timing too. At this point of time I can't wait to go for National Service. It's a source of income, no matter how tiny the pay might be, but I'm fine with crashing at friends' place just to save cost. I also can't wait to get away from my father, no matter how much of a bastard I sound. I've seen since the time he retired to now that his health has gone downhill and he's going a bit nutty in the head. I don't know if he realizes it and I talked to a few people about it and decided it was best if he started working again. But we never had a good conversation-relation so the only time we could confront each other was in the car. I gave him a piece of my mind, trying to be nice in tone but sharp in words.
"You have to start working. Why don't you start working?" I asked.
"Why? Why can't I retire early? I've worked so hard."
"I'm not asking you to work hard. Just enough to keep yourself sane. At this age you're gonna go under menopause. You'll go senile if you sit around doing nothing."
He changed the subject and started talking to my mom. So whatever.
One of the reasons why I'm still over at Stunt Production is because of all the "creepy" things that go around in the Whampoa office. I used to be terrified whenever I start feeling things crawling up my back but at this place it was different. Uncle Jimmy is committed when he prays. Everyday he cleans the altar and I observe the process. When he prays it is deep and concentrated. Until now i still don't understand why my parents say if I don't pray, I'll be like the Chinese, who "don't pray". If anything, I think it takes much more effort for Chinese Buddhists to pray than Muslims.
But religion is another issue and I have a strong objective regarding it. i won't cover that now.
Uncle Jimmy always tells me I am blessed somewhat. Born lucky. And this will always be with me. I guess that's nice to hear. Out of respect, I do burn jossticks to the God of Health, God of Earth and the Thai Buddha whenever I come over to the office. I say again, out of RESPECT. With the amount of religious paranoia hanging around today it's hard to keep them from nagging at your feet.
You could say this has helped a bit in luck. Uncle Jimmy and I have seen our fair share of things happening around the office. Sometimes when we're present together. It's an amazing thing for me. It just reassures me that this world is so big and deep. I may be wrong, but if it helps me keep calm and not fret about so many non-issues in life, why not just let it be? It's just like religion in a way, except for the fact I'm not forcing it down another person's throat.
Throughout this recent times I keep having thoughts that linger around for far longer than they should. Deja Vus happen a fuckload of often lately after I left Mediacorp. I keep thinking of earthquakes and floods in the coming week. Maybe it's the wacky sticks i've been smoking. Or i havent been getting much action lately.
I was practicing my guitar one day after waking up from a weird dream. I hate having those dreams. They call it lucid dreaming.. where you are able to control whatever the hell you do in your dreams. Everytime I wake up from one of this I get this throbbing headache and I feel so tired overall. For a few weeks I could only think of one person: my friend Javis.
He and I have gone through our ups and downs over the years in secondary school. It was mostly up, and I loved him like crazy. We'd drift closer and apart every now and then - closer when he's single and apart once he gets a girlfriend. We'd share in lots of crap together, and very often I find that he understands my jokes far more than anyone else. Everything bonded together rather easily. But our ties were severed one time in Year One when I used him for entirely selfish reasons to gain an advantage. It was not pleasant at all though it was a silent departure. I never heard from him again, even though our blocks were nearby in Poly and the next time I heard of him, he got kicked out of school and was working in part-time jobs. Sad, really. In retrospect, he's the one I'd consider hardworking and intelligent. The ones I hang out with after that were selfish idiots. I'd consider them so selfish that they'd rather fellate themselves rather than have someone do it for them. I'm glad they're gone now.
I'd meet Javis every now and then at his work place at Orchard Rd. A little cafe called Far Coast. He's not working there now. When he left the place I didn't even know. After that I received news that he was in a band as a singer with some old friends from secondary school and shortly after left for National Service. By then I was about to finish Year Two in Poly. Time, really, flies.
I never heard from him anymore for the longest time until just a day ago. Have you ever had that kind of feeling that someone is about to call you, or sms you, or whatever and it really comes? Sometimes I wonder is it because I'm thinking of them first, or that they were thinking of me. It's happen a lot lately. And I was thinking of Javis the whole week for a VERY long time. When things like this start happening I get very careful and sensitive because if anything, it's not right.
I was having a meeting at 12am over at Hoods Inc. in River Valley Road regarding the shoot in May. It was a long meeting. I was spaced out that time... because I've been doing some experiments at home in regards to hypnosis, sound and the brain (binaural beats) so I probably messed something up there. Some might ask "Where the hell do you come up with this stupid ideas?!" The fact is, I'm as clueless as you.
Javis sms-ed me when I was getting restless. It's been a year, and I was really happy. He wanted to meet me "for a smoke". I used this as an excuse to leave the meeting because by the looks of it, it'll be on till 4am in the morning. If anyone from Hoods reads this, I am terribly sorry.
I took a cab down to his place and called him down. We hugged and punched each other in a friendly manner and got to the smoking. If there was some dope and a bottle of Jim Beam I guarantee it will be a fucking awesome night. I knew something was up the moment I saw him and I found out soon after. Apparently someone was after him i was asked to help him on it. Immediately I was thrown back to what Uncle Jimmy mentioned. I won't reveal much since the coal is still pretty hot but let me say it was freaking accurate.
The twist here in the story, that I find extremely weird is that Javis has been to Uncle Jimmy's place when he was just a young boy. Apparently his father and Jimmy had some ties there. Javis told me about it before, back when I first met Uncle Jimmy in 2004, before I even applied for Poly. And I totally forgot.
I agreed to help Vis a bit. And we hung around catching up.
Then he said a few bits of line that creeped the hell out of me.
They were:
"If it's mine, it's mine."
"When the time is right, it will come."
"This kind of money is not meant to be eaten."
"Audi you are very lucky."
These are the exact four lines that Uncle Jimmy always preaches to me. It's like my mantra. It blew my mind off. It could all just be one major coincidence with no meaning at all. But damn, that was fucking cool.
We hung around abit more, i showed him a bit of my kungfu training, and we parted our ways.
Within this few month my life has taken a major turn. I'm more at ease, I spend time for myself and spend more time for work. My savings are growing and I'm fine with staying single. I've reasoned with myself that having a relationship probably is not the best thing for me now.
A lot of the people I meet, and some of my friends, look at me as I tell my war stories, and they always say the same thing - that I am lucky/chose the right course/leeched of someone else and pretty much have settled down.
The fact is, I'm less stable as I seem. I'm constantly rushing for something, that I have no idea what, and it probably is just my excuse to keep myself sane... like a drug. It's exciting. Every corner lays a gem. There will be the ups and downs... some minor.. some major.. some uncomparable. I might just be climbing now, or I'm already at my peak, I don't know. I could go higher, or I could stumble and fall over. And I love the prospect of both.
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