It was another week for me. After Poly everything has picked up on my side, career-wise. I can say I'm very happy when i hear news that some of my classmates are indeed getting jobs. Then there are some that can't seem to start working. I don't blame them. If I could I would tell them to enjoy what they have first.
I have been feeling rather upset lately at this whole film industry thing. After Mediacorp, I developed this grudge against a lot of things in this industry in Singapore. I was over for a wrap party for a film I was called in to act at the eleventh hour. It's a film by Zhao Wei called "Invisible Children". I met the crew in Toa Payoh and I was slated to be just another one of those who hangs around in the background. I knew some of the crew there, and some were the first couple of batches from FSV. I had Adeline, my classmate during Poly, working as a Production Assistant and she was the one who called me. Don't you ever get the feeling that this world is too damn small?
I've never been to a wrap party from a production company. Uncle Jimmy never liked the idea of me pursuing an acting career for it's short-lived timeframe. But it's undeniably a good way to gather contacts. The whole night everybody was asking the same question,"So what are you doing now?" You can easily see through that gesture. Most were asking for the sake of conversation. Others were using it as a medium to show off what they're doing now. A minority were hoping for "backdoor entrances". I find the entire thing ridiculous. My mentality that night was to get away from work. I don't want to think of work. But everyone is forcing you to talk about it.
I took and interest with the lead actor for the film. He was good looking and overall very cheerful and open. Boo Jun Feng and friends were also acting for the film. I heard about him first from school lectures on a film he made called "Katong Fuge". I never watched the film but my friends who did came back calling it "Katong Fuck". On the other hand there were my lecturers who would gaggle and foam in the mouths talking about Boo Jun Feng. When I saw him and his friends on set I didn't care about the fact he was a director or whatever. If anything these guys were the funniest bunch of stoned actors. They were overall very nice people as well.
But back to this lead actor. He was preparing for a scene and we got bored and found a guitar nearby. What are the odds? It had its full set of strings and was tuned. He started playing a bit here and there some random chords. I haven't really picked up a guitar yet at that time (It was February this year) so it got my attention. I thought his playing was godly!
It was then he started to hum and sing and that shut the whole room up, mostly. My mind raced back to the time I met Shah in school, before the days he was advertised for Anugerah in 2007 or 2006. Shah would sing out of the blue and sometimes we got into little chats about how to sing, music, and the fact that my fashion sense was all over the place back then.
This actor's voice was pleasant to hear. When it came to the wrap party a few weeks later we met up again. He came in with a load of bracelets and necklaces. He was still in NS and I had no idea what to talk about that night. All I could think of that night was the wine and champagne. We finally decided to talk about the food at the party. It was the weirdest conversation ever.
It went something like:
"The curry is nice..."
"Yea it is isn't it."
"...uh huh..."
"I should get some."
"Oh yes you should."
"Yea maybe later. The desserts look good too."
"Oh yes it is."
"....."
The conversation finally fell short and we kept silent. We knew no one there except for the crew and the other actors there had their own bunch of friends already. Eric Khoo was there too thought I didn't know it was him. Gary, Royston Tan's famous right hand man, was there as well.
Some bad renditions of chinese pop songs were playing over the speakers that time. They basically changed the vocal track to an off-key piano. Lee Hom, Jay Zhou, they were turned into freaking pianos. The worst part was that the tracks looped after about 5 songs. Then this guy started singing again. It was incredibly good to hear. I took out my camera phone and recorded a bit of it. I don't know why.... but after Sly I have this thirst to look for music. I never was interested before. Now I found myself really listening and looking for music. I knew this guy was a part time singer. I asked him how he started out. And that's when I realised that this guy was Leon Lim... one of the S-pop singers... Campus Superstar.. so on and so forth. We talked a bit more and I found him to be very sincere. He had to leave early so we exchanged numbers. When I took out my phone he saw the desktop picture.
"Eh? Isn't that Sylvester?"
Turns out, these two know each other. I've said it once, and I'll say it again. There is no fucking way you can hide in the Singapore Media Industry.
I shook hands with Eric Khoo before I left. That was a particularly disturbing experience. A friend of mine was with me and he wanted to leave. I had to shake Eric's hands. I don't know his movies, I've watched some but never liked any, but my school's a big fan of his. I saw him get out of his chair and walked into the lobby. I followed him. Then I realised he was going for a piss. It got me thinking... here I am... gonna meet Eric Khoo... I'm gonna shake his hand... and he just took a piss.
He came out after a while, I called him, he received us warmly, and I shook his hands. I could just see it in his face. Two teenage guys just waited for him outside the toilet to shake his hand after taking a piss, wtf?
After this show I received a call from Putnam of Tisch Asia. I was going to act as the lead role in his film. Again, it's not a paid job. I've spent this whole week travelling to Kembangan to rehearse at his place. It's hard work and the smoking habit isn't helping at all.
I sat down one night with Jason at the usual 925 kopitiam. I was telling him how shitty a lot of things are in our work. I boldly told him that if any of our friends from secondary school were to join this industry they'll die. This arrogance prompted him to ask me, "Then why are you still doing this?"
I never asked myself this question. I thought about it for a while. I looked back to the school days. All the production I've went through and the war stories we've shared in Poly. The late nights. The smoking. The times we went insane. We've seen a lot. Daryl, Don, Rahman, Kwang Wei, Kang Sheng, etc etc. I find it quite an insane journey. We're not even making money. Some of us aren't ready for adult life. Not everyone of us were on the same page at all. We've walked this road and we've seen those who surprise us and we've seen a couple collapse in exhaustion. After graduation here are some flying high. Some are still with their luggage tucked under their arms, waiting for a ride, not knowing where to go. We're like a half-arsed, half-fucked band of frat boys with big dreams but not knowing what exactly are those dreams.
Then I remembered why I still did this. I looked at him, then up above, thinking. I said,"Have you ever been on stage to perform? Have you ever felt this rush... this rush so great that you start to shiver, your legs become weak, and you're about to faint. But the irony is that everyone likes you and you're doing a great job. This is exactly what you get in this line. Even as a crew or as an actor. One moment you're just sitting at home, smoking, drinking. Nothing is in your mind. You think of nothing. You think of ending it all. The next moment here you are in the middle of the night. Everyone is running around, some are shouting. You suddenly have a brotherhood going along and you have a common goal. You squeeze and twist yourself. You exert yourself both physically and mentally to get things done with the minimal you have. And when it's all said and done, you're sitting here in this coffeeshop, exhausted as hell, you haven't bathed in a week, all you want to do is jack off and sleep. You look at the film the next few weeks and everybody is impressed. You look back and recall. You ask yourself,"Did I really do that?". I dont' think this is something accountancy can give you. Or engineering. Or aeronautics. We're just a bunch of grunts working for another person's idea. The fucking thrill is what keeps me here."
Initially I wanted to talk about something else but it turned to this angle of story. It's okay. I think it's good on itself. See you next post.
I have been feeling rather upset lately at this whole film industry thing. After Mediacorp, I developed this grudge against a lot of things in this industry in Singapore. I was over for a wrap party for a film I was called in to act at the eleventh hour. It's a film by Zhao Wei called "Invisible Children". I met the crew in Toa Payoh and I was slated to be just another one of those who hangs around in the background. I knew some of the crew there, and some were the first couple of batches from FSV. I had Adeline, my classmate during Poly, working as a Production Assistant and she was the one who called me. Don't you ever get the feeling that this world is too damn small?
I've never been to a wrap party from a production company. Uncle Jimmy never liked the idea of me pursuing an acting career for it's short-lived timeframe. But it's undeniably a good way to gather contacts. The whole night everybody was asking the same question,"So what are you doing now?" You can easily see through that gesture. Most were asking for the sake of conversation. Others were using it as a medium to show off what they're doing now. A minority were hoping for "backdoor entrances". I find the entire thing ridiculous. My mentality that night was to get away from work. I don't want to think of work. But everyone is forcing you to talk about it.
I took and interest with the lead actor for the film. He was good looking and overall very cheerful and open. Boo Jun Feng and friends were also acting for the film. I heard about him first from school lectures on a film he made called "Katong Fuge". I never watched the film but my friends who did came back calling it "Katong Fuck". On the other hand there were my lecturers who would gaggle and foam in the mouths talking about Boo Jun Feng. When I saw him and his friends on set I didn't care about the fact he was a director or whatever. If anything these guys were the funniest bunch of stoned actors. They were overall very nice people as well.
But back to this lead actor. He was preparing for a scene and we got bored and found a guitar nearby. What are the odds? It had its full set of strings and was tuned. He started playing a bit here and there some random chords. I haven't really picked up a guitar yet at that time (It was February this year) so it got my attention. I thought his playing was godly!
It was then he started to hum and sing and that shut the whole room up, mostly. My mind raced back to the time I met Shah in school, before the days he was advertised for Anugerah in 2007 or 2006. Shah would sing out of the blue and sometimes we got into little chats about how to sing, music, and the fact that my fashion sense was all over the place back then.
This actor's voice was pleasant to hear. When it came to the wrap party a few weeks later we met up again. He came in with a load of bracelets and necklaces. He was still in NS and I had no idea what to talk about that night. All I could think of that night was the wine and champagne. We finally decided to talk about the food at the party. It was the weirdest conversation ever.
It went something like:
"The curry is nice..."
"Yea it is isn't it."
"...uh huh..."
"I should get some."
"Oh yes you should."
"Yea maybe later. The desserts look good too."
"Oh yes it is."
"....."
The conversation finally fell short and we kept silent. We knew no one there except for the crew and the other actors there had their own bunch of friends already. Eric Khoo was there too thought I didn't know it was him. Gary, Royston Tan's famous right hand man, was there as well.
Some bad renditions of chinese pop songs were playing over the speakers that time. They basically changed the vocal track to an off-key piano. Lee Hom, Jay Zhou, they were turned into freaking pianos. The worst part was that the tracks looped after about 5 songs. Then this guy started singing again. It was incredibly good to hear. I took out my camera phone and recorded a bit of it. I don't know why.... but after Sly I have this thirst to look for music. I never was interested before. Now I found myself really listening and looking for music. I knew this guy was a part time singer. I asked him how he started out. And that's when I realised that this guy was Leon Lim... one of the S-pop singers... Campus Superstar.. so on and so forth. We talked a bit more and I found him to be very sincere. He had to leave early so we exchanged numbers. When I took out my phone he saw the desktop picture.
"Eh? Isn't that Sylvester?"
Turns out, these two know each other. I've said it once, and I'll say it again. There is no fucking way you can hide in the Singapore Media Industry.
I shook hands with Eric Khoo before I left. That was a particularly disturbing experience. A friend of mine was with me and he wanted to leave. I had to shake Eric's hands. I don't know his movies, I've watched some but never liked any, but my school's a big fan of his. I saw him get out of his chair and walked into the lobby. I followed him. Then I realised he was going for a piss. It got me thinking... here I am... gonna meet Eric Khoo... I'm gonna shake his hand... and he just took a piss.
He came out after a while, I called him, he received us warmly, and I shook his hands. I could just see it in his face. Two teenage guys just waited for him outside the toilet to shake his hand after taking a piss, wtf?
After this show I received a call from Putnam of Tisch Asia. I was going to act as the lead role in his film. Again, it's not a paid job. I've spent this whole week travelling to Kembangan to rehearse at his place. It's hard work and the smoking habit isn't helping at all.
I sat down one night with Jason at the usual 925 kopitiam. I was telling him how shitty a lot of things are in our work. I boldly told him that if any of our friends from secondary school were to join this industry they'll die. This arrogance prompted him to ask me, "Then why are you still doing this?"
I never asked myself this question. I thought about it for a while. I looked back to the school days. All the production I've went through and the war stories we've shared in Poly. The late nights. The smoking. The times we went insane. We've seen a lot. Daryl, Don, Rahman, Kwang Wei, Kang Sheng, etc etc. I find it quite an insane journey. We're not even making money. Some of us aren't ready for adult life. Not everyone of us were on the same page at all. We've walked this road and we've seen those who surprise us and we've seen a couple collapse in exhaustion. After graduation here are some flying high. Some are still with their luggage tucked under their arms, waiting for a ride, not knowing where to go. We're like a half-arsed, half-fucked band of frat boys with big dreams but not knowing what exactly are those dreams.
Then I remembered why I still did this. I looked at him, then up above, thinking. I said,"Have you ever been on stage to perform? Have you ever felt this rush... this rush so great that you start to shiver, your legs become weak, and you're about to faint. But the irony is that everyone likes you and you're doing a great job. This is exactly what you get in this line. Even as a crew or as an actor. One moment you're just sitting at home, smoking, drinking. Nothing is in your mind. You think of nothing. You think of ending it all. The next moment here you are in the middle of the night. Everyone is running around, some are shouting. You suddenly have a brotherhood going along and you have a common goal. You squeeze and twist yourself. You exert yourself both physically and mentally to get things done with the minimal you have. And when it's all said and done, you're sitting here in this coffeeshop, exhausted as hell, you haven't bathed in a week, all you want to do is jack off and sleep. You look at the film the next few weeks and everybody is impressed. You look back and recall. You ask yourself,"Did I really do that?". I dont' think this is something accountancy can give you. Or engineering. Or aeronautics. We're just a bunch of grunts working for another person's idea. The fucking thrill is what keeps me here."
Initially I wanted to talk about something else but it turned to this angle of story. It's okay. I think it's good on itself. See you next post.
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Audi
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