The other day I was in my Johor house for a short vacation. Didn’t celebrate the New Year like some idiot teens in Singapore who get drunk then get wasted by some tit-squeezing bangla later on (of course, this is not limited to one sex). Anyways Orchard road has taken a hell of a beating with the rubbish left behind from Christmas and now the New Year. I guess I’d prefer my little home in a new developing town that lies on top of a hill that it gets so bloody chilly in the morning, I have to wear a jacket to get out in the little “garden”.
And the 2 horsepower aircon in my room pWn3z!
Anyways I was watering the grass yesterday (hey, water’s cheap!) and thought of a few things….
It’s only in Johor that:
- Singapore cars are the slowest (in johor, my dad’s a racer with the country’s speed limit at 110km/h. In singapore he’s driving with one finger and snoring at the 90km/h limit. I guess many of us still abide the 90km/h rule in Johor)
- Singapore cars are the nicest to look at and most well maintained. (lol…)
- Their pavements are just lumps of mud and diluted concrete (someone didn’t read the instruction manual again……)
- Many of the best and biggest houses in the new estates….. are Singapore-owned. (I saw a three-storey bungalow with a garage and 60-degree staircases leading up to the front door yesterday night…)
- There are lamposts in the city…….. but somehow, noone dares to turn them on.
- You fill up your own petrol in the station while two worker fags in the kiosk stare at you.. then giggle when they sneakily deactivate your pump station and see you bring your car for a spin to all the other pump stations.
- Lanes as wide as 6 lanes…… have no lane markers…… and everyone doesn’t drive straight.
- Like the lampost thingy, highways stretch far deep into the country…. And they all have no lights. Second link is a good example.
- Their drainage canals are filled with sand and a garden appears a few weeks later.
- You can see the horizon (try that in Singapore from your home.)
- Whenever someone puts a traffic signboard, some faggot comes over with a tree and plants it right infront of it. Some are worse…. They take ANOTHER signboard and put it infront of the other.
- And of course… a “No Dumping” sign becomes a dumping spot.
And…
- It’s only in Johor that I can DRIVE…. Well.. around the neighbourhood…. To collect the prata or sth…
Lol the shops here are so close, my dad would come down to one of them with a car.. say… a hardware store, then ask for things like ladders and doorknobs and garbage bins. Later as he’s paying for the items, he asks the guy,”Send it to my home, okay?”.
Of course, the guy HAS to nod (the house is just behind, lol.).
Later on my dad gets in the car, drives down the lane and stops about four shops later, gets into the next shop, buys a few things, asks the same question… then maybe get some ice cream, and we go home, eating our ice creams on the patio, waiting for the things to be delivered, and our car still is warm when they leave.
One time, a white van came by, stopped, the door opened, a teen boy in faded clothings came out with a small box in his hand. He walked up to my gate, I went to see him and he passed me the little box… which happened to contain a lightbulb for the kitchen light. -.-
Yeah… I like this little rest home of mine. There are security guards, regular patrols, and my dad plonked a lot of money for a security system which consists no less than motion sensors that turn lights on, magnetic sensors for all things that can open and close in the house (but the fridge and cupboards.., a password-protected alarm system (it went off by accident today… woke the whole estate up), steel padlocks for everything and my favourite; FIVE security cameras on which can be monitored via Internet (as in, we dont monitor the cameras but you get what I mean….)
Now I wish my friends could come over….
And the 2 horsepower aircon in my room pWn3z!
Anyways I was watering the grass yesterday (hey, water’s cheap!) and thought of a few things….
It’s only in Johor that:
- Singapore cars are the slowest (in johor, my dad’s a racer with the country’s speed limit at 110km/h. In singapore he’s driving with one finger and snoring at the 90km/h limit. I guess many of us still abide the 90km/h rule in Johor)
- Singapore cars are the nicest to look at and most well maintained. (lol…)
- Their pavements are just lumps of mud and diluted concrete (someone didn’t read the instruction manual again……)
- Many of the best and biggest houses in the new estates….. are Singapore-owned. (I saw a three-storey bungalow with a garage and 60-degree staircases leading up to the front door yesterday night…)
- There are lamposts in the city…….. but somehow, noone dares to turn them on.
- You fill up your own petrol in the station while two worker fags in the kiosk stare at you.. then giggle when they sneakily deactivate your pump station and see you bring your car for a spin to all the other pump stations.
- Lanes as wide as 6 lanes…… have no lane markers…… and everyone doesn’t drive straight.
- Like the lampost thingy, highways stretch far deep into the country…. And they all have no lights. Second link is a good example.
- Their drainage canals are filled with sand and a garden appears a few weeks later.
- You can see the horizon (try that in Singapore from your home.)
- Whenever someone puts a traffic signboard, some faggot comes over with a tree and plants it right infront of it. Some are worse…. They take ANOTHER signboard and put it infront of the other.
- And of course… a “No Dumping” sign becomes a dumping spot.
And…
- It’s only in Johor that I can DRIVE…. Well.. around the neighbourhood…. To collect the prata or sth…
Lol the shops here are so close, my dad would come down to one of them with a car.. say… a hardware store, then ask for things like ladders and doorknobs and garbage bins. Later as he’s paying for the items, he asks the guy,”Send it to my home, okay?”.
Of course, the guy HAS to nod (the house is just behind, lol.).
Later on my dad gets in the car, drives down the lane and stops about four shops later, gets into the next shop, buys a few things, asks the same question… then maybe get some ice cream, and we go home, eating our ice creams on the patio, waiting for the things to be delivered, and our car still is warm when they leave.
One time, a white van came by, stopped, the door opened, a teen boy in faded clothings came out with a small box in his hand. He walked up to my gate, I went to see him and he passed me the little box… which happened to contain a lightbulb for the kitchen light. -.-
Yeah… I like this little rest home of mine. There are security guards, regular patrols, and my dad plonked a lot of money for a security system which consists no less than motion sensors that turn lights on, magnetic sensors for all things that can open and close in the house (but the fridge and cupboards.., a password-protected alarm system (it went off by accident today… woke the whole estate up), steel padlocks for everything and my favourite; FIVE security cameras on which can be monitored via Internet (as in, we dont monitor the cameras but you get what I mean….)
Now I wish my friends could come over….
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Audi
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